NEW YEAR !

Well HELLO beautiful people!

I hope you've had/are having an AMAZING New year's Celebration🙌🙌! Me and my Sparkling grape soda sure did! it's already 10 past 8 in the morning of the first here on my little patch of dirt. 💤💤💤

I found my self restless and stirring for most of the night, contemplating if twenty nineteen would be merciless or nurturing, perhaps even both 😅😅? haha

The past 6 months of my life and been an INCREDIBLE roller coaster to say the least. 😒😒 Many people have come and gone from my life, Let's just say 2018 was NOT, my friend 😥💢💢 Maybe I really need like a massage and a manicure or something to pamper myself haha😜🙆 I think I deserve a little love for making it through hahaha... 

Anyway *ehem*, it's now 2019. I feel like it's finally going to be a good year, I'm not certain so don't place any bets on her yet 💀💁😂 but I think we MAY have a good one this time, (at least... I'm hopeful for anyway 😂😂)

I didn't make any "New Years Resolutions" because (let's be honest here 😅😅) None of us ever really reach the finish line on those "resolutions" haha "new year new me" = "new years resolutions" Which quite frankly is a big fancy word for *drum roll please* BROKEN PROMISES 😂😂😂👏

BUT I am all for self betterment, which you don't have to wait a whole year for, if you want to do it just do it. 

Life is continual progression, not just a check list and then you're done, you'll forever be learning, forever improving, forever growing. 

Make some attainable goals. or even baby steps towards a bigger goal.. I know for myself I have (FINALLY) figured out my aspirations, dreams and direction... 

Honestly, I've reached a point where, I want to settle down, I don't dream about white picket fences, because when you meet the right people, Home is no longer a place but a person, So where ever they go as long as you're together it's home... 

I don't dream of a perfect knight in shining Armour... I think about someone who is willing and ready for change and progression. 

Someone who makes me  want to be a better person, to grow and progress..

Most importantly, someone who will CHOOSE me, and continually choose me... 

I'm done chasing after people who don't want me, thinking about and crying over it all.. I just ask myself "WHY would you want to be with someone who isn't excited to be with you." and it's a legit question! WHY would you? chase after someone who doesn't see or appreciate you? who isn't excited to see you and be with you? Love yourself enough to know your worth. 

Now....I'm not "desperate" for someone to come along... I'm okay if I end up a spinster with 10 dogs and a few birds... but it'd be nice, you know? hah I'm allowed to dream so SHHH hahaha. 

Anyway, I think it's just that time, someone said to me As long as you're doing your best in the eyes of the lord, everything will work out the way it's supposed to, maybe not always how you think it will but how it's best going to teach you..

I started this post at 8:10... only finishing it now at 22:57 gee its been a busy day.. i'm off to bed

that's all from me folks,

the reformed, but forever weird and nerdy
Miss Hermit